Sex and love.
Sex and love.
I want to start with a joke. A guy and a girl have sex. And here she is in the midst of the process suddenly asks the guy: "do you love me?". The guy freezes and indignantly responds: "No, what am I doing with you now?! A?!" And again. Quite often in everyday communication about the sexual act, they say romantically "made love". It certainly sounds nicer than getting fucked. But there is also, it turns out this is something in common. Really? Both of these examples show that there is a lot in common between sexual love and sex. At the same time, there are fundamental differences. That's what we wanted to think about. We looked at love, specifically sexual love. And to have sex. What is common? What are the differences? And here's what we got.
Love is a feeling, an attitude, and sex is an action, a behavior. Love is for someone (something), and sex is with someone (something). Love may not involve close and direct interaction with the object of love. You can love at a distance and unrequited. This is even for many a key sign of love. Although, we do not agree with this. And sex implies a close and direct interaction. Love is a very ambiguous concept. It is freely used in very different contexts: love for the Motherland, love for beer, for a dog, for your car. Sex is a rather narrow concept and is not used in these contexts. And when it is not used in the sense of direct sexual action, the positive meaning of the concept of "sex" is replaced by a negative one. Thus, the expression "sex with a car" is more likely to be interpreted as solving some problems than as performing sexual acts with a person with a car. Although, in principle, this sometimes occurs.
Spatially, love is localized in the upper part of the person: chest, head, hands. And sex - in the lower part-the stomach, genitals, anus, thighs, legs. Love is closer to the intellect, especially the part where images are created and stored. Sex is closer to instincts, especially the reproductive instinct. Sex and love can exist separately from each other. There can be sex without love and love without sex. But most often they are connected and one leads to another. Love leads to sex. And this is true mainly for women. Sex leads to love. And this is correct mainly for men. Up to a fairly high level of intensity, love is not perceived as love. It is mainly regarded as sympathy, friendship. But from a certain level, there is a qualitative leap. And sexual arousal, even at a low intensity, is already perceived as sexual. And it is easier for men to recognize it. However, they "help" in this erection, which is difficult to miss. However, at a very high intensity of sexual desire, when it turns into passion, it is easy to confuse it with love. And this confusion is most easily created in men's heads.
For some reason, love seems to be out of time. It is subjective, is always eternal. But, of course, we know from experience that love comes and goes. Sex is always limited in time, as if it flares up for a short time and fades. It is possible to love and even as if naturally constantly, but to have sex-periodically. It is quite difficult to imagine "eternal sex". At the same time, it seems to us that there is something perverse and even painful in this idea of "eternal sex". You can love quite a lot of people at the same time. You can even love all of humanity. All men, all women. In this sense, love is somehow less restricted than sex. But having sex with a large number of people at the same time is quite difficult. There are clear quantitative restrictions. So it is quite difficult for a man to engage in active, penetrating sex with two women at once. It is a little easier for a woman to have sex with two men at once. But if we talk about three, four or more men, it will not work at the same time. Only one at a time.
Love is a personal feeling addressed to the individual, to the soul. It focuses on the uniqueness of this person, his uniqueness. Sex is impersonal. It is directed at the body. And it is focused on the universality of this body and its elements: the breast, the phallus, the vagina, and so on. Such elements, if they excite, will attract both in this and the other person. Of course, there is individualization of the body: smells or "scar on your favorite ass" and so on. But usually this binding occurs after a long conversation. And then it loses its brightness, sharpness of attractiveness. *** Here's what we got. We hope that it will be interesting and useful for you to dive into this topic with us.